One sign

Allan sat at the edge of his bed,in just his blue boxers, gripping a bottle of vodka. His eyes were glossy and wild, they darted all around the room. He peered at the shotgun he had against his night stand.

“How could she take everything? She took everything from me.” His voice was in a whisper.

He chugged the vodka as he thought about the week he had. First thing Monday morning his divorce was finalized, which barely left him with the shirt on his back. Today he lost custody of his three kids to his now ex-wife and it devastated him.

“The car…okay. The house…alright. The kids? Why? The first two aren’t even mine biologically but they have my last name, they’re in my will, and she just takes them from me?” He had spent the last six hours talking to himself, trying to make sense of it all.

His ex-wife had said there were irreconcilable differences and claimed that ,besides the fact that he was too busy with work to spend time with the kids, the affair he had over sixteen years ago had plagued their relationship for years and had undoubtedly caused the roller coaster of problems they faced throughout their marriage.

“It was one time over a decade ago!” He gulped some more vodka. “It wasn’t even worth mentioning. She could’ve left then, before we had a child together and before I built such a strong relationship with the first two boys. I was young for crying out loud!” He slammed the bottle on the night stand.

He met his ex-wife when she was five months pregnant with her second son and her first son was just a year old. She was the daughter of a family friend, who had come to stay with her father after she got pregnant again at nineteen. He couldn’t have imagined back then that he would have fallen in love with her and married her in a couple of months.

“You don’t want to be with me Cathy? Fine! Take everything! And you can have the satisfaction of taking my life too.” He grabbed the vodka and swallowed the last bit. He reached for the shotgun and held it between his thighs.

He began to sob uncontrollably. “Nothing good has come out of this week. All I need is one sign that life is still worth living or I’m ending it.” He said as he looked up at the ceiling. “Just one.”

The room was silent and felt empty. An overwhelming feeling of loneliness took over his body. He propped up the shotgun and decided this was it.

*Ring* The phone sounded off. He ignored it.




“Ugh!” He picked up the phone. His vision too blurred to read the caller ID. “Who is this?”

“Hey dad!” It was his youngest son Jordan. Allen’s heart sunk. “What are you doing this weekend? Mom got us tickets to the game and she got one for you too. Skylar and AJ are here, you’re on speaker.”

“Hi dad!” The other two boys said in unison.

“So are you coming? It’s a big game. No refund.” Jordan continued.

“Yea I…I’ll be there boys.”

“Awesome! See you then. We love you.”

“I love you all too.” Allen hung up the phone. He had somehow sobered up now. He unloaded the shotgun a placed it under his bed. “Thank you!” He said looking up once more. “Thank you!


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